Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Randomize