I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Randomize
