I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize
