Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
You need Xanax blowdarts
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
