chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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