He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Randomize