But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
