hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
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