Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize