he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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