Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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