11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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