I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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