Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Randomize
