Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(770): View more from Georgia

I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.

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(506): View more from New Brunswick

A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest

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(503): View more from Oregon

He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning

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If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
Read it at the TFLN blog
(541): View more from Oregon

You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth

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(404): View more from Georgia

She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts

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(404): View more from Georgia

You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up

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(818): View more from California

The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.

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(937): View more from Ohio

Are you feeling better yet?

(937): View more from Ohio

I need a nap and a new butthole

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