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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
