Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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