just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
