i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
NoShamevember. You game?
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize