ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
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