Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Randomize
