So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
