Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I have demons in me.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Randomize
