Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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