Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Randomize
