Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information