Texts From Last Night

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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.

  (1-250): View more from British Columbia

  I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.

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  (250): Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you. (1-250): I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this. http://tfl.nu/x6e9
  Replies (25) Good night (11872) Bad night (964)
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  (310): View more from California

  Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.

  (310): View more from California

  I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.

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  (310): Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail. (310): I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore. http://tfl.nu/tf34
  Replies (11) Good night (3653) Bad night (959)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.

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  (305): i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer. http://tfl.nu/jibz
  Replies (52) Good night (37261) Bad night (1868)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.

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  (201): She's NOT homeless...she graduated early. http://tfl.nu/5ymo
  Replies (11) Good night (2966) Bad night (639)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head

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  (604): it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head http://tfl.nu/xa8x
  Replies (38) Good night (5084) Bad night (1470)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.

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  (317): update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good. http://tfl.nu/p2ef
  Replies (6) Good night (3925) Bad night (746)
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.

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  (647): Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again. http://tfl.nu/40qc
  Replies (5) Good night (519) Bad night (1333)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.

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  (615): I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause. http://tfl.nu/2yit
  Replies (8) Good night (1703) Bad night (921)
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  (818): View more from California

  Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."

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  (818): Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right." http://tfl.nu/w7y1
  Replies (8) Good night (716) Bad night (1342)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.

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  (402): I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night. http://tfl.nu/7j2p
  Replies (3) Good night (497) Bad night (1197)
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!

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  (989): We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right! http://tfl.nu/l472
  Replies (4) Good night (1564) Bad night (423)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together

  (1-612): View more from Minnesota

  A true beacon of hope in these dark times

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  (612): He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together (1-612): A true beacon of hope in these dark times http://tfl.nu/8p83
  Replies (12) Good night (2204) Bad night (625)
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  (928): View more from Arizona

  I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five

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  (928): I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five http://tfl.nu/12yz
  Replies (3) Good night (889) Bad night (375)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.

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  (269): I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive. http://tfl.nu/3jo8
  Replies (2) Good night (353) Bad night (569)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.

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  (203): I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all. http://tfl.nu/yj74
  Replies (1) Good night (191) Bad night (375)

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