just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
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I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
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I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in