I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
