I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
tell me about the fingering
Randomize