oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
You smell like stripper and shame
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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