Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
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