I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
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