People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
