Nicole vs. Life
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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