all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
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