She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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