So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
My life is pants optional.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize