When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Your cock deserves a montage
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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