I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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