So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Randomize
