You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Randomize