Texts From Last Night

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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.

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  (774): I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you. http://tfl.nu/weck
  Replies (18) Good night (5319) Bad night (947)
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.

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  (414): I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay. http://tfl.nu/pwts
  Replies (214) Good night (12220) Bad night (3485)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.

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  (618): he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever. http://tfl.nu/csmh
  Replies (14) Good night (4786) Bad night (632)
• Favorite

  (260): View more from Indiana

  Vodka is such a love hate relationship.

  (661): View more from California

  Truer words have never been spoken.

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  (260): Vodka is such a love hate relationship. (661): Truer words have never been spoken. http://tfl.nu/p042
  Replies (21) Good night (5295) Bad night (1153)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.

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  (818): I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder. http://tfl.nu/z8u4
  Replies (50) Good night (6633) Bad night (2519)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?

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  (516): How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear? http://tfl.nu/ycsa
  Replies (22) Good night (1380) Bad night (3928)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  I don't have enough holes for all these australians

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  (408): I don't have enough holes for all these australians http://tfl.nu/dq24
  Replies (13) Good night (5923) Bad night (1336)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.

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  (336): You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed. http://tfl.nu/k43u
  Replies (4) Good night (2254) Bad night (1411)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...

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  (630): Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know... http://tfl.nu/4kg9
  Replies (7) Good night (1394) Bad night (1894)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.

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  (978): Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child. http://tfl.nu/fq2v
  Replies (7) Good night (1090) Bad night (1742)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday

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  (440): she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday http://tfl.nu/5s11
  Replies (4) Good night (621) Bad night (597)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh

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  (914): His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh http://tfl.nu/ih42
  Replies (1) Good night (538) Bad night (286)
• Favorite

  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?

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  (902): I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it? http://tfl.nu/w0e4
  Replies (2) Good night (596) Bad night (328)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.

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  (845): You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts. http://tfl.nu/ido5
  Replies (3) Good night (510) Bad night (260)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.

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  (330): Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now. http://tfl.nu/qkkr
  Replies (4) Good night (307) Bad night (726)

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