Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
29 “I’m Getting Old” Moments
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
19 Worst Song Lyrics of All Time
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
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