Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I smell like Dick and happiness
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
