I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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