If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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