Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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