there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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