David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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