i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
