is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
